Prayer Swap

Last week during our Adoptive Parent Training we learned about the Family Supporting Adoption National Conference that is held annually in Utah - we hope to go this year. Last year they had a keynote speaker named Troy Dunn who talked about the importance of open adoption. Here is a segment of his presentation. I really enjoyed his perspective on open adoption since he has seen it from many angles.

Adoptive Parent Training

Jared and I went to a two day workshop designed to help adoptive parents create a successful adoption experience. It was well worth our time. The best part was a panel of birth mothers who were gracious enough to describe their intense experiences to our group. These courageous women have been through a lot! I knew their stories would make me cry, and they did.

We learned that these mothers very carefully, and prayerfully, searched for a mother and father who they believed would provide the kind of care they wanted for their precious baby. It makes sense to describe adoption as placement, not “giving up” a child. They are acting for their child, not for themselves, not even for adoptive couples.

Saturday influenced our opinions about openness in adoption. Overall it is usually better for the child AND the birth mother (and even for the adoptive parents) to have contact after placement. Another speaker at the training who was herself adopted, said that with a totally closed adoption as hers had been for a long time, she had nothing but questions – no answers, no people to help finish her personal story. Now I feel we can happily provide a birth mother with the links to her baby that she will likely want. This may mean an ongoing blog with pictures, it could mean phone calls, and could mean in-person visits. That is okay – I understand that the child we would hope to have in our family will have another special person (maybe many people) who are indeed an important part of their lives.

Chat Room

Last night I had the opportunity to participate in an adoption "Chat Room" in a physical building with couches, chairs and even refreshments. Present at the discussion were individuals who have adopted, those who are hoping to adopt and birth mothers who have placed their babies with adoptive couples. Unfortunately Amy was not able to attend, but I went to learn as much as I could. The theme of the evening was about helping extended family learn about adoption and help them feel comfortable with adoption. A fair amount of time was spent on this subject, but the discussion went in many different directions as different participants asked questions or shared experiences. I was most touched by the love and courage that I saw and heard as birth mothers shared some of their experiences interacting with the adoptive couples they have chosen to place their child with. Leaving the discussion I have a better appreciation for the difficult decision that birth parents have in deciding to place their child and also choosing an adoptive couple. I enjoyed the atmosphere of learning about each others situations. Birth mothers were asking questions to adoptive couples and adoptive couples asking questions to birth mothers and even hopeful adoptive couples asking questions to both adoptive couples and birth mothers. We look forward to attending more "Chat Room" meetings in the future.

Separation Anxiety

The title of this blog has a double meaning. First, referring to using my adorable egg separator for the first time, and second, to the anxiety my parent's dog experienced when he was left with us for a short visit. These two events just happened to coincide.

Making my first Lemon Meringue pie required separating egg whites and yolks and beating the whites into submission. The picture at the right is a handmade ceramic piece made just for such an occasion. I bought it at a summer street fair. You crack the egg and empty all the contents into the top, and then tip it forward until the whites ooze out of the mouth while the yolk stays inside. It's both amusing and effective. The whole pie process went well until we sliced into the pie after it had chilled for several hours. In my head it was going to look like a Wayne Thiebaud painting, but in reality it puddled. I don't know what went wrong - I'll have to check with a grandmother for that. The filling did have a great flavor.

And then there was the dog...my parents are going to be leaving their beloved pet with us for a weekend so we thought it would be good to do a shorter test run today. Their dog is much like ours, maybe a bit spoiled and used to quite a bit of attention. He whined and barked at first, but eventually settled down. Our dog was amazingly calm. When I sat down after making the pie, I had one dog on my lap, one dog at my feet, and our cat looking at all of us in disgust.

El Salvador Restaurant

Last night we went to one of our favorite restaurants in Provo. They have food that is reminiscent of some of the food Jared had on his mission. It is a humble establishment but very comfortable and the people who run it are very welcoming. We always get pupusas (pictured) which are biscuit-like flat breads filled with beans, cheese, or meat. Since we started going there about five years ago we have learned to fry our own plantains, they're almost as good as the restaurant. We also ordered some pastelitos, which are corn pies, ours were filled with pork. And finally, as if we weren't full enough, we ordered our tres leches which is a simple cake that has absorbed a sweet milk syrup. So good.